The thing about being pregnant is, you can never really know how it feels unless you’re pregnant yourself. You don’t know what pregnancy feels like just because you’ve read up on pregnancy or you have friends and relatives who are pregnant. Nope.
As a matter of fact, doctors who have never been pregnant, cannot say exactly how pregnancy feels like.
Being pregnant is a whirlwind of emotions. My pregnant days are behind me for now but I’d never forget how I felt then and how I reacted to stuff. A lot of times I felt like punching a few people right in the face because of the stupid stuff that kept coming out of their mouths.
But now that my pregnant days are behind me, I started to realize that a lot of people don’t know how to behave around pregnant women. It’s not that they want to say stupid stuff, they just don’t know when they do. It’s funny now that I think of it which is why I decided to do this post about the stupid things “Unpregnant” people say to and around pregnant people and what you should say instead.
Pregnancy is different for every woman. It’s one of the most unique experiences in life and that’s one of the things that makes it beautiful. No two pregnant women are completely alike, You should keep this in mind when next you see a pregnant woman.
You don’t comment on how much she’s sweating just because you have a pregnant aunt at home who doesn’t sweat.
I remember the time I went out with a friend and she kept talking about how much I was sweating. “My sister didn’t sweat this much when she was pregnant last year”. “Uuhnmmmmn, your sister didn’t sweat, That’s great for her you know. But do I look like your sister? Am I related to you? Wait, are you mad?” Instead of comparing me to your sister who didn’t sweat, why not offer me a bottle of water? Never mind though, I’ll get it myself!
And that’s not even the worst part of my encounter with her that day. I don’t even want to go into how it was time to eat and she kept talking about how much food I was “consuming”
Well incase there are people who don’t know how the human body works out there, babies get their food from the mother while they are still in the womb. So leave me and my big plate of food alone.
Instead of asking me why I have to eat all that food, just shut up, sit down and pass me the ketchup and the salt and that meat on your plate that you’re not interested in eating and please when there’s a pregnant woman in the house, don’t eat the last piece of anything at all. *eyes roll*
Another thing that really pissed me off was when people ask to see my belly.
I’m sorry but do you not see the bulge? Is that not enough for you? Why should I raise my clothes up for you to see what a pregnant belly looks like?
It’s crazy. Coming from a little child though, it’s cute that they are curious but a grown up asking me to open my shirt so they can see my belly is creepy. Please my body is not a show for your entertainment, get away from me.
I had someone ask “when was the last time you saw your feet” and someone else asked if I could still see my vagina with my stomach that big. The answer is no. No, I can’t see my feet anymore and no I can’t see my vagina anymore when I stand to take a shower or when I sit. The only time I see my vagina is when I’m holding a mirror to it BUT that is an inappropriate question. It’s a really personal one and not something I particularly like to discuss with anyone unless you’re the one who put the baby in me.
And then there’s this annoying thing some women who have been pregnant before say to pregnant women that’s not cool. They either talk about how they didn’t have any morning sickness or fall sick all through OR they talk about how pregnancy was one of the scariest things that happened to them and how they were sick for the whole 9 months.
Like I said earlier, pregnancy is different for every woman. I understand that your pregnancy was smooth and all but I’m sick. I throw up every morning and I feel so sick but you do realize that I have no control over what happens to my body, right? Right?
Annnndddd, I’m already scared enough as it is. I do not need to know that I might be sick until the day I deliver. Please let me go through this the way my body wants to.
“Have you guys decided on the name of the baby yet?”
This is probably the most harmless question you could ask but it stressed me. Like, we haven’t picked out a name yet, we’re just trying to get to the end of this pregnancy and have a healthy baby. I’m just so focused on BEING pregnant for now.
I know that a lot of people have names picked out before the baby is even conceived and that’s cool but even if I have a name already, why should I tell you so you can ask me why I picked that very name and then you start suggesting other cute names you think I should name my baby. Let’s all chill please. When the time comes, the baby will be named. For now, what is that strong smell? What kind of perfume is that? Seriously, it is choking me. Move away from me please.
The weeks leading up to when I gave birth were the absolute worst because my baby came a few days later than was expected. I dreaded leaving the house because of the people who asked me stupid questions like “Are you still pregnant?” Errrrrrrrmmm, no. I am not pregnant. I already delivered the baby but this big stomach is fun to carry around so I’m just waddling around with it…are you blind though? What kind of stupid question is that really? How do you see a woman who’s obviously still pregnant and ask her that? Ugggh.
“You look so huge. I can’t believe you haven’t given birth yet” well believe it please. This is the last thing I want to hear at this stage. I am sick and tired of being pregnant already myself. Stop pointing it out to me. I’m the one carrying it around, trust me I see it. I haven’t forgotten that I am pregnant.
Keep your labor room horror stories to yourself at this stage I beg you. Do you think I have not read every pregnancy book I can find? Do you think that at this stage, I don’t know what I signed up for? I have heard enough stories and read enough things on pregnancy and labor. I’m scared already, trying to scare me more at this point is not going to help me. I know it’s not a walk in the park and I’m ready. You can encourage and pray for me instead.
Also, don’t tell a woman who is about to give birth that you’re scared for her. I had a friend call me up in the middle of the night telling me about the scary dream she just had about me in the labor room and how I delivered a “non human like” creature. Please that is NOT cool. Stop seeing me in your Dreams, that’s creepy enough and pregnant women think about how their babies will look when they finally come out, with Down syndrome and other defects being a possibility. Do not add to her fears please.
We all know that pregnancy is a crazy period with its highs and lows. Sweet and scary. Pregnant women are hormonal and sensitive, let’s watch what we say to and around them.
These are things that pissed me off when I was pregnant with my daughter. They might not piss the next woman off but you never know. Better safe than apologizing to a hormonal woman. LOL
*Kisses*
